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Question: Any former military guys

Blog Last Activity 11 years ago 1.5K views 66 comments

I did a bad thing and it hangs heavy on me this morning. Yesterday I was hanging out at a little Deli coffee shop. It wasnt very busy and I was chatting up the very cute guy behind the counter Tyler. We hit it off he was 19 and hot as a firecracker so I decided to ask what time he got off. We made arrangements for me to meet him back at the shop at 8:00

I walked about a half a mile down the road to a Super8 and got a room for the night Showered and cleaned up real good. Went back at 8:00 met Tyler. He had a car so we went to an Applebees and had the two for $20. Had a great dinner and lots of laughs.

Decided to go to a show, I wanted to see the Expendables 2 movie so we went to it but when we came out Tyler had a flat and there were 4 gangbanger types leaning against the car. They started saying crap about gays and they didnt want us in their theaters go back to the stroll. ( Tyler later explained that's the known gay bar area this is the burbs) This kid was scared to death, he was 5 10 perhaps 145 dripping wet.

I told him to give me the keys in go back into the theater I would change the tire. As he started to they began pushing him. I am not a big guy, I have lost a lot of my bulk simce getting out of the service, but I am still 6 1 and 180 so I stepped between them.

I tried I swear I tried to calm the situation down, seems thay had seen us in applebees and followed us. I told tyler to go call the cops and thats when it all went to hell. One of them hit him in the face, and he went down. Next thing I saw was this beautiful young face with blood gushing from his nose and tears pouring from his eyes and him screaming theyre gonna kill us theyre gonna kill us!

I snapped, I havent raised a hand in anger since Iraq. I swore I never again. Suddenly I was in boot again, next thing I know they were all on the ground and the cops were there and I was being handcuffed.

Luckly at the station Tyler backed up my story and the other guys had previous charges. The cops also took my military Serevice into account. Hell they even sent a tow out and had Tyler's tire changed. Of course now he is frightened of me and we decided to part as friends and not lovers.

I cant get it out of my mind how I snapped, how I resorted to violence and it just came out as a reflex. Does that make me dangerous, or a psycopath? Am I a bad person, I feel terrible that I couldnt reason with those people, they were just misguided, I should have been able to reach them not beat them senseless.

As a fellow soldier have you ever faced anything such as this?

A confused Tommy

Comments

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11 years ago

Thanks Davey, Its not like Tyler and I were close friends only met once. I believe his Mother thought I was the first guy to go out with her son. I think he perhaps is in a bit of a pickle trying to explain to his mother why he was out with me and why they were bothering us. I also think the police have labled it a hate crime so that take some explaining too. I dont think she knows he's gay. So I kinda Did goo by helping with the bullies but kinda messed up his nice safe life. He knows how to contact me if he ever wants to. Again I only met him once and caused enough of a mess, he has friends and family around him. If he needs me he'll call.

Davey1965
Davey1965
11 years ago

Sorry to hear that youll be arrested if you try to see Tyler.
When you asked Tyler to go out with you,you wernt to know that you would
be involved in a Homophobic attack Tommy.Thank god you were there to
protect Tyler as he could have just as easily been with a friend that
couldnt fight them off and he could have been hurt more seriously.
I understand were his mum is coming from tho and she just wants to protect
her boy from being harmed again. Even if you dont see him again Tommy
you will still have the memories of meeting him and getting to know him
a bit. Take care Tommy and i wish u a happy thanks giving if your not
with friends or Family Today or tomorrow xo David 8-)

11 years ago

I think your training took over, which is exactly what's supposed to happen. You were both at risk and you did the right thing. You're also not responsible for how other people react to what you do, so it's pointless to beat your self up over it. If you hit someone for no reason, then you should worry.

11 years ago

I just got a Blistering email from Tylers mother. She blames me for everything that happened. Evidently she pestered the shit out of him till he gave her my email. He was a good christian boy till I tried to take advantage of him. I put him in harms way. If I ever come around him or contact him again she will have me arrested. He doesnt need preverts in his life. I just sent her a very polite email saying I was very sorry for what had happened and that I would ofcourse respect her wishes. The police knew how to contact me if they needed me for the case.

11 years ago

Davey, you are just too cool for words, I love you man. Wish me luck. I have a blind date tonight. I dont mean she is actually blind I mean I've never met her. (remember I am Bisexual)

Davey1965
Davey1965
11 years ago

Only Nick can do that Tommy,You could ask him.
Dont feel too bad, Remember Jesus,He had skeptics too and they wanted him
hung from a Cross.

11 years ago

Thanks Davey I am willing to move on, is there a way to delete this blog and put an end to it once and for all?

Davey1965
Davey1965
11 years ago

Thank god all our Returned Service men dont have to front up with there Qualifications.
I see this blog got turned upside down like in the days of hillboy and payalot.
Lets all get along and make this a wonderful site for all.

11 years ago

By the way, Georgets, I showed you mine lets see yours?

11 years ago

I accept your apology Georgets, I am sorry I blew up this morning.

nate88
nate88
11 years ago

OK you two. Time for a chillpill. You BOTH are my 'personal' friends and I'm glad I stayed out of this one and letyou both get it worked out. I cherish both of your friendship and the PM's too. Andy

Georgets - I'm VERY proud of you. Takes a MAN to appologize.

11 years ago

I am sorry that I doubted your military career. I still believe that you have an overactive imagination, but as I say, I apologise.

11 years ago

Georgets, besides my DD214 do you want the death certificates of my parents?

11 years ago

Thanks guys, well Gerorgets, Verify,, Verify,,I was born in Elkhorn Nebraska a burb of Omaha the largest city in NE. Colder than snot on a dead man in winter. Went to Elkhorn High School Graduated (Go antlers!! Rah Rah Rah) Lost my father to a heart attack in my Sophmore year so it was just me and my Mom ( I lost her to cancer in 2010). Graduated in 2005 and signed up I was 18. Did my BCT thats Basic Combat Training at Fort Leonard Wood in Missouri. Nice place. In the middle of nowhere. I guess thats the point. Assigned to Ft Bliss Texas, I deployed in January 2006. What else would you like my Service number? I know should I post a copy of my DD214? I think you are nothing but some teenager with little man complex and this is the only place you can feel like a big man. I have tried to be nice. I have tried to respect you. I have never said anything negative about you till now but for you to ask me to verify myself. So here it is. You pompus ass.

11 years ago

i love that you swore never to resort to violence. war is a terrible thing, i myself have swore myself to a pacifist lifestyle. -----i myself follow Buddhism. most although i dont follow Tibetan buddhism, i do value much of what their teachers (called lamas) have to say. the dalai lama and many lamas under him say it is only acceptable to use violence if your life is in danger. can never do more damage than what is necessary to protect yourself, in addition dont fatally wound if possible. (remember lamas are guides not gods, you dont have to follow their rules to reach enlightenment)------
We are all challenged in our lives once in a while. the key is to not let it effect you or your beliefs. Enlightenment isn't just achieved by nonviolence, its achieved by self fulfillment. how you achieve this is following your morals and knowing you did the right thing.-----I personally believe you did the right thing. Yes you may have broken your moral code but you've done so for a noble cause (in my opinion;) protecting an innocent person. MY SUGGESTION to you is to search your soul a bit, see if you believe you did the right thing, was it worth it. And remember your karma is not effected by what you have done, but the way what you have done makes you feel, so there is no bad karma if you think you did the right thing. if you feel you've done wrong you can always make it right, we aren't perfect.---- you can always message me if you want to talk more.

anjinsan
anjinsan
11 years ago

@ Georgets.
How DARE you presume to speak for me! I have no reason to question mrpenisman's statement that he has served in the military. I am willing to accept what he says, I have absolutely NO reason not to. Please take your pathetic attempts at cyber-bullying elsewhere.

11 years ago

I am sure "Anjisan" and "Livingnude" - as I am, are curious to your claim to be a former soldier. Please give details. - They are easily verified.

11 years ago

Wow, I feel for you. That is indeed a heart wrenching story. I understand totally how you feel in the situation. I felt the same way in my situation. Weighing the options and looking back I believe that the situations were somewhat different. I truly am sorry for what happened to you, what a terrible memory to have to live with. If you need to talk feel free to PM me. I dont think you should hold yourself to blame for what the kid did. I suspect (just my opinion) that there was more to it than just your altercation that caused the shooting. This goes right back to what I've told Georgets you never know what is going to set someone off. Once that gun is in someones hand bad shit will follow. I am just so very sorry it happened in your life and you have to remember it.

anjinsan
anjinsan
11 years ago

I wish that I lived in Georgets' England if homophobic attacks are unknown. Here are just two recent ones from my home city. I could post links to many, many more if you want them.
http://menmedia.co.uk/manchestereveningnews/news/s/1588788_muggers-targeted-cerebral-palsy-sufferer-as-he-waited-for-taxi-in-gay-village http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2012/06/11/manchester-police-appeal-after-body-found-in-gay-village-canal/

11 years ago

Thanks, I appreciate your support. Evidently things like this dont happen in England. According to Gerogets. I am glad I was there and I am keeping in touch with Tyler, he is doing well. Back to work. I am in Corvallis Oregon till Thanksgiving now staying with friends. I've never been put into that situation before and hope that I am never put into it again. I am just looking for friends and new experiences as I travel. Not looking to fight or make enemies. (sorry Georgets even though you want to be my enemy you can't I still love you Kiss Kiss, smooch smooch)

11 years ago

first of all my hat goes off for you, i am a gay man living in calif everytime i go too work i get some kind of b.s about being gay even my boss has called me the f word before , but i need my job and need too survive ... my point is i am happy you stood up for your rights as a gay man . and i hope those gang bangers get time in prison . but dont even feel bad , all in all it was just a bad experience , and you or youyr freind are not even responsible , if you was then you would have been the one being arrested . its just too bad that your freind and you had too part ways ....sorry