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Caleb's Not-Love Life (short story)


Caleb’s Not-Love Life (PART ONE)
A Gay Story by Jack
***note that all characters portrayed in this work of fiction are 18 years of age or OLDER***


Layton, USA
Mid-afternoon

20-year-old Caleb Carson was sitting on the front porch of his Mother’s home in a quiet residential neighborhood. Slim and tan, Caleb stood 5‘10“ and weighed 169 pounds. He had short, spiky light brown hair and dark eyes, and his cute face glowed when he smiled. Caleb was a very attractive young man, in his faded skinny jeans, tight striped t-shirt and red and white tennis shoes. As he sat on the cheap plastic lawn chair, listening to birds chirp on this warm, sunny Summer afternoon, he thought about his friend, Dakota Parker. Dakota was a bit younger than Caleb - only 18 - but Caleb had been attracted to him ever since he had met the boy at the local park. Caleb was gay, in the closet, and during their short friendship, he had yet to tell Dakota. The two had met only three months earlier, and they had hit it off right away. It all happened by accident: Caleb was merely taking an afternoon walk and just happened to cut through the community park, which was a short-cut home. Usually when Caleb was out walking, he took the long way around the park. However, if he had done that on that particular day, he never would have met Dakota!
As Caleb walked along the gravel pathway that ran through the park, up ahead he could see a young man walking toward him. Caleb suddenly felt a bit awkward. He knew he would have to pass this boy and he didn’t know him. They were still about 20 feet apart. Caleb wondered, should I make eye-contact or lower my gaze? Should I say 'hey’? Or maybe 'how’s it going’? No, that sounds stupid. Just keep quiet and don’t look at him, Caleb decided. So, Caleb pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and pretended to be focused on it. But as he got closer to the approaching teenager, the kid said something to him....
“Hey there!” came a soft voice.
Caleb looked up and saw an angel. He was staring into the face of a beautiful young guy! The boy had stopped on the pathway and was looking right at Caleb. He was very cute, with a round boyish face, a button-nose and big blue eyes that sparkled. His dark brown wavy hair banged down over his eye-brows and covered his ears. The kid was skinny, about 5' 9“, wearing skater clothes - consisting of a red t-shirt with some kind of logo on it, khaki cargo shorts, and hi-top sneakers. He was toting a colorful skateboard under his left arm and had on several bracelets and wrist bands. Caleb noticed the boy’s face was perspiring and he had visible wet spots on his shirt under his arms. Caleb could smell the kid from two feet away - a mixture of body spray and sweat - the sweet smell of an active boy!
Caleb swallowed hard and tried to think of what to say.
“Um, hey!” Caleb croaked out, his voice cracking.
Damn it, Caleb thought. I am going to fuck this up! He was feeling the butterflies buzzing in his stomach now. This boy was so attractive!
“Nice day to walk,” the boy said, smiling broadly.
“Oh, yeah, it’s purdy..pretty, I mean,” Caleb said, laughing nervously. He rubbed the back of his neck.
The boy kept staring. “Yeah,” he said finally, looking all around. “Good day to be boarding.” He lifted up his skateboard to show Caleb. “Do you board?”
“Uh, no, not really,” Caleb said. “My friend Jeremy does sometimes. But I probably wouldn’t be very good at it. I ride a bike though.”
“Oh,” the boy said, then turned his head to look to the right.
Is he disappointed in what I just said, Caleb asked himself. What do I say now? This is so awkward! Caleb’s mind was racing, because he really wanted to talk this boy. But he was afraid he was going to lose him and just one minute into the conversation at that!
“Well, I don’t board, but I get 'bored’ a lot,” Caleb joked, with a chuckle.
The kid shook his head, grinning blandly, “Oh, so lame.”
Caleb felt his face growing hot. He really was blowing this! He had to save it somehow!
“I, uh, like skateboarding a lot, though,” Caleb stuttered. “I...I think it’s really cool. The guys that can do it are cool, ya know.”
“Well, I must be cool then,” the boy said, with a giggle. “I do it a lot...and I think I’m pretty good. Just saying.”
“Can I see what you can do?” Caleb asked, not really knowing what else to say. He wanted to keep this kid talking to him, no matter what.
The kids face lit up. “Really? You want me to show you my moves?”
“Absolutely!” Caleb said, probably with way too much enthusiasm, but still, it worked.
“Okay,” the kid said. “Let’s go down to the sidewalk.”
“Great,” Caleb said, and fell in step beside the young man.
The two walked along the park path together now, but in silence.
“I’m Dakota, by the way,” the boy finally said, sticking out his hand to Caleb.
As they continued to walk toward Sycamore street, Caleb took his new friends hand and shook it. The hand was soft and warm, damp with sweat.
“Caleb,” Caleb said.
“Cool,” Dakota said, nodding. He seemed very pleased with that name. “My brother’s name is Caleb, too.”
“Seriously?” Caleb said, turning his head to look at the side of Dakota’s face. Even his profile was perfect!
“Yep!” Dakota answered.
Finally, they arrived at the sidewalk on Sycamore and Dakota displayed his skateboarding talent for Caleb. The two young men spent the rest of the afternoon together that day - walking around town and talking. They bonded fast and became best friends within a week.
But now, sitting on the porch of his childhood home, Caleb felt so badly about how he and Dakota had ended up. Caleb had been giving Dakota the cold shoulder for the past two weeks, after finding out that Dakota had been talking to a girl online. Even though Dakota had never said he was gay, Caleb had assumed that Dakota was homosexual like him. Caleb’s theory was simple: if he was straight, why would a cute guy like Dakota be single at age 18 and seem to have no interest in the opposite sex? Once, when Caleb asked him about a girlfriend, Dakota had laughed it off, stating that he never had dated any girls. So, Caleb had fallen for the younger man, and was deeply in-love with him. They had become very close friends, often even sharing a hug. Dakota always initiated the hugs, too, not Caleb, and he thought that perhaps these “friendship hugs” were actually Dakota’s way of making a pass at him. But Caleb was too afraid to ask Dakota if he was gay, or reveal that he was gay himself. What if Dakota wasn't gay?! What if he rejected Caleb? What if he never wanted to see Caleb again? it was too risky to come out to Dakota without being 100% sure that he was gay, too. However, that was not the case and now Dakota was in a long distance relationship with some chick he met on the internet.
“We are gonna meet sometime this Summer,” Dakota had told Caleb two weeks earlier, as he unveiled a picture of his new-found girlfriend on his cell phone. “What do ya think?”
Caleb had just stood there, staring at the photo, his mouth hanging slack, his eyes narrow. Seeing the girl, Caleb’s stomach knotted and he felt light-headed, as he realized what Dakota had just proved to him.
“Uh, wow!” Caleb forced the words. “Y-yeah...she’s just...great.”
Dakota’s face turned puzzled. “You don’t seem to happy about it. Is something wrong, Caleb?”
“No, nothing,” Caleb said, his lips tight. “Nothing at all.”
With that, Caleb turned and walked out of Dakota’s bedroom. Dakota followed his friend down the hall, asking him over and over what the problem was, but Caleb refused to answer him. Caleb left Dakota’s house that day, and never went back. On several occasions, Dakota had texted him, left voice-mails and even emailed him. But Caleb had never responded. Finally, the texts and emails from Dakota stopped coming.
Caleb’s heart was broken. He had fallen head-over-heals for Dakota Parker, and at one point thought there was a real chance of becoming his boyfriend. Now his dreams were shattered. Caleb felt cold and alone once again. What a fool he had been! He was mad at Dakota for leading him on. And when Caleb tried to rationalize the situation, he simply couldn’t do it. In his mind, whether it was true or not, Dakota and him had grown close, and were practically boyfriends. Then out of the blue, Dakota decided to break up with him and go with someone else. At least, that was how it felt to Caleb. If they had really been boyfriends, it couldn’t have been any worse, from his point-of-view.

TO BE CONTINUED....