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maxumillion21 Blog Last Activity 10 years ago 476 views 4 comments
<p>I would consider myself young at 22, yet consider myself old at mind. I tend to be mature and overthink many things, some people call me boring. Possibly because I dont want to be doing immature pranks or jokes. I live on my own away from my mom and younger brother. I love it, yet I find it lonely. At times i find myself wondering what is the purpose of life. I love life dont get me wrong, but everyday feels mundane. I am afraid to comeout, I know deep down that I am Gay...but for some reason There is a part of me that is ashamed and embarrased. My whole life I have grown around anti-gay family and friends. My entire life I have put on this personna that is also anti-gay. I am afraid to stop putting on the mask that I have been hidding behind my entire life.

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10 years ago

be you and make no apologies for it! If anyone needs to be ashamed or embarrassed, are your mom and brother if they can't accept you as you are, and for what you are! you are bored >>>have mom and bro over for dinner sometime, helps to keep the bond strong.and tell them if you feel the need....tell them you love them... hugz paparon xoxo>>.Christmas is coming!

LukaWhiteBoy
10 years ago

Dude is your mom a single parent to you? and how much younger is your brother? There is a good chance that they both know already. Think about that a bit. Mom's seem to know and if your brother is closer in age to you he probably already knows too. Think about that too. It would be good for you to stop going along with the queer bashing comments though; just like stay silent when it happens at first u kno? Be slow about telling anyone and do it when u have time in your life for some disruption; like not right before exams or anything like that.
Be sure that you tell your mom and dad and brother how you love them ahead of time. well before you tell them about your sexual stuff; like weeks before so it is solid and open that you love them; start from that. I did it last spring. my only real mistake was doing it right before exams it kinda threw me off for a week or two.

austinpscottt
10 years ago

everybody has inner feelings, some say do this or do that, but feeling what is right and what is wrong, tread the path of enlightment. Coming out may be right in an instance but where we grow up, people still have this belief about being gay is wrong, we could say come out, but its not a crime to stay free within ones soul, because staying in, might be better in where you live, celebs have done it all their life, some will say its better to be open, but in the real world it can be fraut with danger. take care

10 years ago

@max. We can offer advice and support, but the only person who can break the deadlock gripping you life is you. What you've said here is a very lucid analysis of the situation. Now you have to take action to resolve the impasse. It's entirely up to you. As Nixon said to Ike after his Checkers speech in 1952, General, it's time to either shit or get off the pot.