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Fond Memory

Blog Last Activity 9 years ago 533 views 22 comments
<p><img class="page-feature" src="http://www.theparkstrust.com/images/parks/tree-cathedral_main.jpg" alt="" width="438" height="240" /></p>

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9 years ago

Guys.. thank y'all for your replies on this blog. The reason I posted it.. was not to upset you, or feel sorry for myself. I wanted you to know that now you are getting to know the real me, I thought it best if I was totally honest. I've had to keep this to myself all these years, and it's been one hell of a burden. I admit I was crying when typing it all but at the same time I felt it's time to show the real me rather than the cheerful front I put on. I've moved on, but it's just remembering him in my arms that really chokes me up still. Again.. thanks everyone.. I really am grateful for your kind words. Once again you have shown what a great, supportive group we have all become. Love y'all xxx

9 years ago

Essex is a kewl place. only an hour from london but got a country feel to it as well. i luv it. I was born in Romford. tend to go to London for fun anyway

TheBurrhead
9 years ago

That is a fantastic photo and place. I'm sorry to hear of your loss. good or bad we never forget our loves. Thanks for posting the pic and your story. I hope you can move forward like most of us have had to do Jordan. -Brillo

9 years ago

I shall tell you when I have been there...and if so, then I expect it will be a great deal of fun!

9 years ago

well you tell me if thats true? haha

9 years ago

That they are all studs :P

9 years ago

i do exactly what i want Nick. i dont offend or upset anybody. if people dont like the way i am or look then tough lol. i am happy with the way i look. hmm, what do they say about Essex boys then?

9 years ago

I think your hair looks okay; inventive - just ignore other people (bloody oiks!) and do what makes you happy....(so, is it true what they say about 'Essex boys'? lol)

9 years ago

i know. i see him as a friend too, he is lovely. cos of the way i am and look i aint always everyones cup of tea (not that i care about that) but we seem to have good conversations and a few laughs which is all good

9 years ago

Of course it is a compliment; I always make compliments - Jordan has a new friend in you Mark

9 years ago

thanks Davey. i guess thats some sort of compliment Nick in that sentence. hehe.

Davey1965
9 years ago

You have a good Heart Mark and i Miss Kev and Paul buddy 8-)

9 years ago

Yes Jordan - you have found Mark, so there is some sort of hope

9 years ago

omg. thats a really sad story Jordan. i had tears in my eyes as well, like davey. although you havnt necessarily broken the promise yet. there is still time. take care and chat later xx

9 years ago

Such an horrible thing to have to go through---so sorry. Thanks for sharing such a difficult and personal experience.

Davey1965
9 years ago

So Beatiful Jordan and its nice to know u still visit there regularly.
I nearly had tears in my eyes and i know it must have been hard for u to write about it.You havent broken any promise at all ..You will find someone and be happy again im sure of that..Just remember that even tho u hold on to his memory just remember his last words because he just wanted you Happy at that was so important to him.Thanks for sharing buddy such a touching Blog.

9 years ago

Sure was.. and okay I fibbed about the being happy part because I still to this day haven't kept that promise lol. Sometimes when I sleep I still see him in my arms. I've just had to learn the hard way that life does go on :)

9 years ago

That is awful HUGS ..must have been quite a shock at a young age

9 years ago

He was on his way back from college in London. It was in those days when we had slam door trains (really old electric trains that were useless at the best of times!). Anyhow, to cut it short (and save me getting upset again) I had a phone call in the evening.. it was a Police Officer asking me if I knew a person.. I said yes and was told there would be someone coming out to see me. Two officers turned up, asked a couple of questions and I let them in. My boyfriend died after a door on the train (now known to have been defective) failed and he fell through it (train was travelling at 75mph). Anyhow, I was told he was calling out my name and wanted me there. They took me to him... and I held him in my arms. We spoke for a very short time but I remember quite clearly still the words he last spoke to me "Promise me you'll find someone and be happy". Shortly after, he closed his eyes and was at rest. Well.. I am happy, but I kinda broke my promise about finding someone who really loved me.

9 years ago

'lost him' - you mean he died? really? what happened?

9 years ago

This is what they call "The Tree Cathedral" on the East side of my hometown. When I was with my 1st boyfriend, we walked through there together holding hands and just loving being with each other. Sadly, I lost him 10 days later... but the memory still lives on to this day and yes.. I still walk through there once a month to remember the good times :)