Today was..... Well, different, you could say. Knowing I had to go to church for a particular reason I was a bit butterflied in the guts. This goes back to the other day when I was called a faggot because I dyed my hair, so lets start there..... After my mom went to the house to chew some ass of the mentioned AssHat, (How am I doing so far Thomas?) the father of the one I love, I was told I would be attending church this morning. I knew my mom was pretty upset of the situation that happened but why would I be attending church? Then I got to thinking, she wants to show the world what hypocrites some people can be. Our whole family went this morning, even my paw paw and he never goes to church. (How am I doing so far Paw Paw?) Paw was not dressed for the occasion but he was not looking like a bum either, he said, "Its the House of our Lord so why does it matter what I look like." Mom was upset with him but she could not argue one bit with his statement. The car is parked, I take a deep breathe, squeezed my inhaler twice and took two more breathes and held it in as long as I could, I knew I was gonna need all I could get cause my butterflies were kicking pretty bad. Walking towards the doors, mom says in a low voice, "Remember to smile and wave, they will hate it if you look happy." Paw is smiling and waving and I am smiling and waving to anyone that looks my way. By now, mom is giving paw, "The Look." and tells him to, "Stop IT!!" as I continue to smile and wave to a couple more I see. Some wave back and smile and some turn their heads as to be in shock that I am smiling and waving at them with my blue hair, lol, we all know who they are, those are the hypocrites. Going to church on Sunday and judging me so early in the morning, yea, hypocrites. Yea!! We see you! We know! Then I hear Paw say, "NOooooooooooooo... You are doing it wrong.... Like this!" He has his mouth open and showing all his teeth. I was like, "Like this? I opened my mouth a little bit and pulled my lips as far back as I could. Yea, Paw got, "The Look" again, lol. "Just trying to help the boy." He says, lol. So I continue to smile and wave at anyone looking my way and I can hear Paw, "Oh!! There's one! Yep! Hypocrite!" There another one!!" OMG!! That had to be the longest walk to the front doors of that church I ever walked as mom gives, "The Look" to paw again, lol. Now I know why mom never asks him to go with us, lol.
Blah, Blah, Blah and a couple of hours of listening to Charlie Brown's teacher talking, its over. OK!!! Lets get the "H" "E" double hockey sticks out of here. But oh nooooo... Brother Sanders has to stand up and he has something to say... Ok, please hurry, I am ready to go. Hope I do not offend anyone, not my goal here, God lives in my heart not at church, well, he lives there too but I hope you know what I mean. Brother Sanders is standing there, in front of God and everybody, lol, Get it? lol. Anyway He begins to speak and the first thing out of his mouth was, "Judge not, that ye be not judged." I was like, "YEA!!" "That's what I've been trying to tell everyone all the time!" Then he says some cool stuff, trying to remember the best I can here, I remember him saying, "Why are we all here? To ensure our place into the Kingdom of Heaven. We are not wanting to go to hell are we? Let me introduce you to a young man that has be through hell and has been through hell more than once. Joel, please stand up." I was like, WTF?!! As I slowly slide down and tried to disappear underneath the pew mom grabs me and I heard paw say, "Stand up boy!" There I was, in front of God and everybody, lol. Standing there everyone looking at me, not waving and not smiling anymore, you could have heard a pin drop. Please HURRY Brother Sanders! I was thinking. He begins to speak again and by now I am getting hot and I feel sweat coming out of me. "I want everyone to point at anyone that this young man is hurting this morning. Go ahead! Get to pointing away at each other and if you are being hurt then feel free to point at yourselves." No one pointed at anyone, you could have heard a pin drop. Sweat is coming out even more, getting hotter, INHALER!!! Brother Sanders speaks again, "Judge not, that ye be not judged.... I want to take this time for each and everyone of you to introduce yourselves to Joel today before leaving. If you have no idea what hell is or what hell he has been through, do not talk amongst yourselves and guess, ask him personally. He will be at the doors to shake each and every hand that leaves today but chances are you will get a hug from him."
