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Sadness and most guilt I'v ever felt
I'm back at SIU Carbondale after my trip this summer. Waiting for my best bud and roomie Conner to return. I got an email from him and I just cant take, here is a part of it:
As you know my father is a Southern Baptist minister and I have been raised in the church. After being back on the farm this summer I began feeling the wrongness of my life on campus. It ate away at me more and more each day, I tried to find solace in the bible but I could not. I am at odds with my own body my christian soul and the devil you awakened in my loins. I finally spoke to my father regarding this, as a learned man and a man of God he has , through hours of silent contemplation, helped me to realize that I cannot remain true to the lord and return to that school of evil. You are an instrument of Satan. Like the whore of Babylon you tempt those chosen of God and make them stray from the path of righteousness. I have decided to accept a missionary assignment in south America to help atone for my sins.
The letter goes on and on about punishments his father made him endure to purge the demon of lust from him. Why ? He is legal age and a grown man. Why allow himself to be treated like this. And Its my fault. I knew he was a virgin and curious. I knew he was horny. I opened the door and he jumped right in. Why didnt I mind my own business. I could have said no when he climbed into my bed at night to fuck me. I could have not set him up with a nice girl who gave him his first pussy for comparison. He enjoyed it all or so it thought.
ARghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Have I ruined his life?
J
I am the son of a preacher, in one of the very conservative movements. People who don't go to church have probably the better variety of friends, and expose their children to more different kinds of people, thus raising kids who are probably more tolerant and open minded. But devout church folks? Wow. Because these church folks' life is wrapped up in their church friends, rather than just being friends with a variety of people, it is indeed very difficult for a lad like this poster's college friend, to give all that up. It is a giving up of all he knows! The church social circles are his entire world! (small tho' it is)
As others have implied in comments, he can try to "pray the gay away" for years, and it's not gonna happen. I tried very hard from 1997-2006, nineteen years I'll never get back. Guess what? The gay didn't pray away. No surprise there.
And these people single-out gayness as the worst possible of sins, when they have either "had to get married" due to unplanned pregnancy, or had extra-marital affairs, or have a love life which is little more than consensual rape, but hey, at least it's straight. My God! There they sit, in the church pews, with all their tawdry sexual issues, but talking about the fags, to deflect attention from their own deeply damaged sexuality.
dude this joker who was a virgin in college prefers voodoo to the reality that it does ab it of time to get used to the fact you are gay. For me I had agonizing guilt for about a month it slowly lifted I was OK with myself and moved on. This has absolutely nothing to do with you and more to do with daddy the brain washer. So just so I am clear we send a guy rebounding and battling homosexuality to a mission to save souls?? Who the fuck are these idiots? I'd look at the humor its so ridiculous its funny. He is scape gating you for is hard cock..FUCK THAT!!t I don't shoulder other people's guilt nor should you. E-mail him just say move on pussy boy. man up and attack back!./ I have zero tolerance for this shit the father is now teaching him to not take responsibility for his actions just blame others. It was him that went from limp to hard with help from no one. he even transported the hard cock to you and I bet he did the insertion into your love canal. So if he did all this WTF did you do? people confuse voodo with religion sometimes.
Not you don't ruined him, his father does.
I know a lot will hate me for that but you can not argue with fanatics, no matter which religion. I hate every kind of religion and it should be banished from this world. Who is so stupid believing in unnatural gods in times of science. False morality slaved us for thousands of years. Free your mind.
honey u have nothing to be sorry about i am sure he enjoyed ever bit of it and will continue to stroke his cock over it :) :) someday he will realize what he really wants is a cock :) :)
Sounds to me like he's ashamed for his lifestyle towards his dad, and is using you to place blame.
Just cherish the memory's you once had and try to move on.
As for the blame part: You are not to blame, people choose who they want to be, and be with. Just be glad you have given him a happy time for the time that it lasted. For him it might have been the last time he could have enjoyed that happiness.
his guilt is eating him up. someday he will return to his attraction to guys. you did nothing wrong. i;m sorry for the pain you are going through.
He chose to participate in whatever you two chose to do together, there was no coercion, he was up for it. You haven't ruined anyone's life, in fact you helped him experience a part of his life that he may have been edging toward for years. His father's and his own complicity in flat-earth fundamentalist Christianity is NOT your problem. Relax and enjoy your life.
Hi ! Poor guy, the fault is your country's bigotry, violence, hate, business, persecution appetence, intolerance and the pig you have is an example. Your father is a hater. He deserves only a fist in the face with the promise you go and never return. You can say he will never see his great children and that you are no more christian, a race of haters, but what you should be A NON BEIEVER. Thers is only one god in USA DOLLAR. Excuse my words. You have to act for you and not believing you are Under orders of a god. Us is nation of bigots with 5 age of IQ.
GOOD LUCK. DO YOUR LIFE !
With affection.
I can understand you are upset, and I've experienced a few similar situations where the guys use certain "excuses" - that they have been led astray. I've taken the virginity numerous guys, probably 100 over the years, whose parents, or they themselves, then blame me for (whatever). Just excuses and you shouldn't feel bad about it. I burst out laughing at the "you awakened the devil in my loins" crap in his email - some choir boy used that excuse on me back in '91 - and it's so dumb. And illogical.
Everyone are bisexual whether they realize it or not. Otherwise everyone chooses what they do. There are those who miss out and those who do not.
You can't turn anyone gay, you have to be born that way. You may have helped him realize it but you didn't make him gay and you certainly didn't force him. He is responsible for his actions not you.
It’s a simple truth that all human beings make mistakes and poor choices. The same goes for when we fail to act when we know we should. There are times when we all look the other way when we know the right thing to do is to take helpful action. So, we should first understand one thing we’re not the first person (nor will we be the the last) who has fallen short in the personal behavior department from time to time.Failing to accept personal responsibility may work to our advantage on occasion or in the short term. For example, we might get away with keeping our mouth shut about something that we’ve done, or even blaming someone else for our misdeeds. We might not face consequences for our wrong actions... at the time. However make no mistake about this eventually this poor choice will catch up with us and, it’ll typically cause more pain for us down the road than if we’d stepped up to the situation, took responsibility for it and honestly said, “I did it”. Sometimes, especially when we’re young, we don’t always see the long-term effects of our behavior. But, make no mistake, accepting responsibility is a major factor in receiving the respect and admiration of those around us. Over time, failing to accept responsibility has severe consequences. First and foremost, it has a devastating effect on their own mind and heart. When they know they have failed to take responsibility for something that they should, it’ll begin to bother them, to eat at them, little by little. Pretty soon, they’ll feel very small inside.That may sound like an exaggeration, but it’s the truth. taking responsibility for our own actions makes life work better. Remember, self-respect is the worth or value we place on our own life. Therefore, one of the consequences of continuingly failing to accept personal responsibility is that we eventually guarantee that we’ll view our life as having little to no real value.
Thank you for your kind word my friends, I guess deep down I wish him all the best in the world. I hope he has a wonderful and satisfying life. As for me I shall forever miss that farmboy that became my best pal. I
J
Youtube:
prof Richard Dawkins. His dislike of bringing up children to believe in such things is enlightening.
If your Friend was born in India, it would be Lord Shiva, If he was born in Ancient Greece, he would adore Zeus, If he was born an Aztec, Inca? Vikings knelt before Zoltan.
A person should never be corrupted by ANY religion. Its about GUILT. Choose your own world.. sometimes not easy to Break away, but NEVER blame others!
Your Friend has returned to the Gates and Bars that will restrain him. He will never be a free man.
.. not sure why I post this HERE, perhaps we have all been under this influence?
I think he made his own choices and now he is looking to blame anyone but himself....You did not force him.....
Lol. Listen. As someone who grew up in the Christian church I learned far too late that they do not value waiting until someone is married before having sex. As a matter of fact unbeknownst to me this community actually had their children off to be deflowered at 13. Usually by other 13 year olds. I know because of the way I have been treated and I have a cousin my age who is a Lutheran minister. They are all liars and backstabbers and most of them neither believe in their faith or have anything to do with it until it is socially convenient. It is a ll about power and abuse. It is very unlikely th father was not sexually active before he married his wife.