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life in general..at end of the road..
I sit here thinking about life--my life--over the years I had sex sex and more sex--then I came out then all my friends scattered like roaches scatter when turn on the lights-- as I get older I picked up new friends just to realize they weren't friends for real..they just used me to play games borrow games movies cd's and when I decide to say hey if cant come over without wanting to borrow something--don't come over---hmm they quit coming over--
Friends are only friends when it suits them. Just be an authentic “You”, be friendly without being fake, and don’t expect anything from anyone. In the modern era of social media, almost everything is cheap, disposable and short lived. Get a hobby, you’d be amazed at the honest, decent people who would love to spend time with you if you’re into the same subject. Hope you feel better bro.
Have you thought about spending time with just yourself doing what it is that you like to do and not worrying that your time should be spent with others and maybe doing what someone else may want to do just for the sake of being with others. I would much rather be by myself doing exactly what I want to do in my own way. I spend a lot of time doing that, by happy choice and at the end of the day I know that I had a good time. Enjoy yourself with yourself.
Don't let it get you down ........ I never had many friends all my life but I felt good having a small core group who seemed to be good and close friends .... and then like you they all scattered ... 2 are still friends of mine but being straight and married and with kids as well as moving away from me they are not seen or talk to often and so the Internet is where I come to spend the time I would normally be spending with friends ........ its not the same as living breathing companionship but at least it is some kind of interaction outside of my own head Â
You say that you had sex, sex and more sex until you came out and then all of your friends left. But you didn't say whether it was straight or gay sex you were having. If it was straight sex and you came out then your friends (straight?) only accepted you as their friend because without giving it thought they assumed you were straight and not gay or even bi. Maybe they left because they feared being judged through guilt by association and weren't strong enough to stand up for themselves.Â
Aside from games, movies and music, what entertains you outside of the house? Nascar, baseball, tinkering with old cars or growing hollyhocks. There are groups, clubs, organizations for any hobby or interest, you name it and that's where you're going to find friends who want to be friends for the sake of friendship. There is always going to be someone who wants to use us in some way, pick up on it and don't let it go further.
yeah...funny how that works
They were not your friends, just that. Maybe they don't deserve your friendship.